this year's resolution
I know I'm a little late with this post but I needed time to figure out my darn life! I'm not into making new year's resolutions but I know that I still wanted to make some personal goals. But I'm not calling them resolutions, dammit, because that's setting myself up for failure. We don't want any of that, thank you!
I digress... this year will be my year claiming happiness and victory. The past few years I've been dealing with "depressing feelings" (not clinical depression) but feeling very, very low on and off and not being able to find my happiness--outside of my lovely family. Towards the end of 2014 for some reason it got better. I started seeing a therapist, started working again, stopped hating LA so much, so on and so forth. But the main thing was that I started carving out 'Cleshawn' time.
I started doing things that made me happy, stuff that I'd do when I was a young, single, independent gal. I think I got a bit lost with my new roles as wife and mother as they both came on suddenly and I don't think I had the proper time to prepare for all the changes. I got everything I wanted in such a short period of time that I was blinded by all these emotions and new roles, no time to process. I'm almost 4 years into my marriage, 2 years into motherhood and I've found my damn groove. I'M BACK and loving it!
What this means for my online life is: more blog content, some damn vlogs--I've been wanting to do this for a while now, it's a way to channel my constant self chatter (I talk to myself-crazy), a webshop selling textiles, and more photography and snippets from my life. I purposely kept my child off of social media because I don't want to violate his privacy but I won't be so guarded in the future. He's mine, I made his ass, therefore, he's a part of my life that I can share.
This is a personal post, and I hope to share more intimate details like this every now and again. I don't want to show only a facade, but the real too. Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Until next time!